The way we are is largely due to how we have been brought up. How many of our parents are experts in child-rearing? The majority of us don't have such parents and then when we become parents ourselves, there is a high chance we take on the parenting styles of our primary care-givers.
From the time I became a mother a decade ago, I realised I had to improve myself because I didn't want to repeat my mother's (primary caregiver) mistakes. Now, three children in tow, I have come to understand why my mother is the way she was and is through the numerous books and courses I have read and taken.
The first vital step is having the right understanding on the issue. Once we have it, half the battle is won. The key, really, is to have an open mind and the willingness to put theories into practice.
The moment we decide we want to change for the better, healing already takes place.
Over the years, I have been merely an avid reader of books on parenting and early childhood development. How much has all the reading help in my quest to be a better parent than my parents? Some help but the real breakthrough for me is after I attended a certificate course on play and creative arts therapy course by UK-based Professor Monika Jephcott of the Academy of Play and Child Psychotherapy (http://apac.org.uk/) in November 2007.
Through the course and additional supervision and training by American Dr Diana-Lea Baranovich, I feel now, the right understanding to how we have become "dysfunctional" lies in child psychotherapy and neuroscience theories.
